A 12-year age gap has never separated my sister and I.
“Hey, let’s take the lift over there!” she suggested. “It should be taking us to that slope for beginners.”
I took a look at mum and dad, who were sitting comfortably, watching us from the glass of the coffee shop. I pointed to the snowy slope with an excited smile and chased after her.
“Let’s go!” I shouted.
On the way back to the hotel, we sat side by side on a shuttle. She plugged the earphones and handed one to me. It was my first time listening to English pop music. Hmm, Bruno Mars. Quite good. Looking at the foreign city from behind the window, I could dimly see the reflection of her smiling at my head laid on her shoulder, gradually falling asleep.
She was a university student at that time, who was regarded as the smartest person in the family by her younger sister. She always did research and planning by herself and was the most reliable tour guide, most of the time.
Once she energetically introduced me to a famous restaurant there. “There are hand-made noodles! We should try it for lunch. For dinner, there is another restaurant in…” However, we walked around the same street 3 to 4 times before going into a random “ramen-ya” to avoid my dad becoming too angry.
After skiing, we made a spontaneous plan to visit a batting centre to satisfy the wish of a little girl who had been into softball lately.
“Can we?” I asked timidly, hiding the excitement rising from below.
“Of course! Let’s go tomorrow,” replied her.
“But we don’t know where,”
“Ask at the hotel kiosk then,”
“But…”
While I was still hesitating, she was already heading to the service desk without looking back. I followed her immediately and stood next to her at the desk, only to see her communicating with the staff with an alien language and some gestures. Very soon, a grin appeared on her face. She received a map from the staff and turned to me, “Done! Go there tomorrow!”
This is my sister. She never disappoints.
***
The next time our family went skiing was two years later. She was busy and didn’t go with us.
I was surrounded by a white forest. The white ground and the brown trunks contrasted each other, but they looked beautiful intertwined together. I got on the lift alone and stared at the snowy slope. There was a girl skiing down ahead of a kid in S-shape. The kid was following her footsteps enthusiastically.
Just like us. I smiled, all alone.
Unwittingly, it was reaching the top of the slope soon. I adjusted the skis, grabbed the poles and was ready to get off the lift, not long before I realized there was no station near the place. Feeling shocked, I turned my head to the front abruptly. My eyes followed the track of cable wires to the summit. I could feel shivers running down the spine. I got off, terrified and lost as a child being put on the battleground.
Where are you? Where is the figure I could always follow and depend on?
I was surrounded by a white forest. There only colours were white and brown, everywhere.
On the way back to the hotel, I plugged in my earphones. “You can count on me, like one-two-three, I’ll be there…” I glanced at the song name displayed on the screen — Count on me. Skip.
She was staying home less often since she started living in the dorm. When I woke up in the morning, I would walk around the home and investigate every room ‘unintentionally’, waiting to see her figure ‘surprisingly’. “Oh, she must have set off already,” I mumbled to myself. Her figure gradually faded out from every part of my regular life, except for a dinner every few weeks.
***
“I am getting married,” she announced the news one day she came home. Surprise and happiness were all I could feel about it.
Her wedding took place in a garden, surrounded by greenery, bushes and a white, wooden fence. I could hear the soft, beautiful melodies of pop music songs before getting in. Above the entrance was a white arch with flowers and vines straggling over it. When the wedding melody was played, we all stood up and turned our heads to the back. The girl in a white dress was walking closer slowly, with a bunch of flowers on hand.
She is beautiful.
She met her groom and they took their seats in front of the white table facing us. I stared at them. What I saw was real, but unrealistic. It felt strange. So strange. The face of the beautiful girl in the white dress was overlapping with the one recalled in my early memories...
You used to share a room for study and living. She warned you not to step on or even dare to lie on her bed, which was also yours actually, unless you had taken a shower. When school ended, you could always see her at the school gate. When you got punished by mum, you always hid behind her and peeped at mum from her back. When you were forced to recite the whole passage just for a vocab test, you complained to her about mum. When you got hurt by the cigarette end on the street, she promised to scold the stranger the next time she caught him.
While these pieces emerged one by one, tears gradually filled in the eyes.
The last part of the ceremony was a photo-shooting session. 'Can we have secondary school classmates to gather for group photos now?' announced the MC. Followed by classmates in university, colleagues at work… Groups of people were approaching them with a genuine smile, joking, playing, making fun of each other. They took photos together and laughed together. Under the sunlight, everyone seemed to be smiling brightly and blissfully along to the melody of a familiar English song.
“Cause I know when I need it I can count on you…” I sang it along secretly.
It was one year from now. “Sum!” a familiar voice crying in the crowd. I turn to that direction, searching for the owner of the voice. A second later, a black, furry dog is coming forward. I look up. Behind it is a girl in her casual wear, smiling with open arms. Whenever I meet her, there will be a flow of warmth that fills my chest, just like the blossom of flowers in the garden of the wedding.